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View Full Version : Badass Harley gangs


theholycow
05-18-2009, 09:57 PM
Yesterday I waited while someone blocked off the 4 lane road to let 50 or 100 Harleys all turn left into the parking lot at a bar. When they finally cleared the road and the more reasonable road users got to continue driving, I looked at the parking lot...it looked like a fucking geriatric convention. I thought about the business opportunities for selling arthritis liniments and Viagra as I drove away.

It reminded me of this picture I took further up the same road a year or two ago...

http://lh6.ggpht.com/_oNsRR_T1Qx0/SDxJMdSAhqI/AAAAAAAACSw/Ic6e8gMLuo8/s800/Badass%20Harley%20gang%20motivator.jpg

I LOL'd at this urbandictionary entry:
A once proud brand of motorcycles that were originally only owned by legit badasses back in the day. Sadly sometime in the `80s posers got into the act and Harley Davidson began to become more concerned with merchandising rather than building decent bikes and it became acceptable for doctors, lawyers, and fat bald guys having a midlife crisis to ride Harleys.

If you own a Harley Davidson edition anything you're not a bad-ass you're a pathetic poser urinating allover the once proud name of Harley Davidson. Fuckin' trendys always ruin everything.

Harley Davidson is now the very definition of selling out.

It was funny, but I guess he forgot that they didn't originally symbolize badassery at all. In the fifties, Hollywood created that image and foisted it on the public, making it a part of the culture. Before that they were just a decent way to get around. I mean, really...what's so badass about operating a vehicle that will get you killed if you get in a minor accident with a Honda Fit? A vehicle that you don't ride in the rain and can't ride in the snow? A badass drives something that can kill people and break stuff. I'm no badass but even I drive something that can bash the hell out of a zebra.

Anyway, more urbandictionary...
When a man is injecting his penis into the girls ass, he pulls on her pigtails and then steps on her hands. This will make it look like he is riding a motorcycle and she will be purring like a harley.
Jon and Heather woke up the neighborhood when he was giving her the Harley Davidson

Another:
Harleys utilize the antiquated and inefficient V-twin engine design, which is a Harley trademark in much the same way tumors are a trademark of cancer victims.

I don't hate Harleys, but it seems that the only people who have them are elderly jackasses with more dollars than sense who forgot what it's like to be woken up by an excessively loud noise outside your house at 2am when you actually need to be at work in the morning. They've also forgotten what it's like to have that happen and have a baby that won't stop crying as a result (I am lucky enough not to have such a thing but I'm aware of how it works). They are the original ricer, far more concerned with an image that was once vaguely related to performance or badassery than they are concerned with actual capability or anything useful like that.

What I don't understand is how these old fucks survive. They can't even drive a car without crashing through a Dunkin Donuts or into a crowd at a festival, but they somehow survive balancing an ill-handling motorcycle? I guess there's just huge quantities of them and none of them actually ride very much, and I'm just seeing different riders every day.

Cez★
05-18-2009, 10:53 PM
nice rant lol. those urbandictionary definitions are hilarious, too bad its blocked here at work, I would spend all my time on it lol